Feelings...

When i finally figured out who i reli lk...its too late...cuz he ad broke up wit me...i'm talkin bout my most recent ex btw...i din get a new bf or anything...still the same ex...haih...can say that i expected it la...cuz our relationship din go that well the 1st time we tried...but still...i had some hope that it wud the 2nd time...i guess he was juz infatuated but i reli did lk him...he wasnt suppose to mean so much...but i guess i reli had a soft spot for him...after all,i did lk him when i was f1 too...he was reli reli sweet at the beginning...he said stuff lk 'i hope i can u every second in my life' and 'u bein in my arms tell me alot bout u' , 'how beautiful u r...how loving u r...' , and 'ur beautiful...to me..' god,i miss those times...but that was a long time ago...lk 4 months ago...i gave up hope of him treatin me lk that again ad...i juz hoped that he wud at least teman me during break n after col or b4 col...i don need him to teman me everyday...i mean i wan to c him everyday but he don hv to teman me all the time...is that reli hard to do?i guess its hard for him...haih...now i'm missiing him lk hell...n wats the use...its not lk he'll come back to me...he ony cares or me as a fren...i don understand...wat went wrong?y didn't it work out?n well,if u r reading this,the reply i sent...it was so...harsh...cuz i was hurt n pissed...i don hate u at all...i nvr did...well,its not that bad...it ony hurts when i'm breathing...my heart ony breaks when its beating...my dreams ony die when i'm dreaming...i might look happy from the outside...but thats bcuz i keep it inside most of the time...well,gotta do my hw ad...altho i don feel lk doin...don feel lk doin much of anything nowadays anyw...then after that hv to cry myself to sleep ad...nitez every1...